Anger management is the process of learning to
recognize signs that you’re becoming angry and
taking action to calm down and deal with the
situation in a productive way. Mayo Clinic
Anger, a normal emotion, can transform into something painful and ugly.
First thoughts of anger issues may bring about images of a couple
fighting, a parent abusing a child, a teenager lashing out at a
teacher or a parent. Rarely will images of angry children come
to mind. Unfortunately children, at very young ages, have to
deal with feelings of anger and rage.
This is a truth that is often difficult to understand or manage.
Effect Of Overlooking Tantrum In Anger Management
Children, young children especially, aren’t normally aware of how they
feel. When a child becomes upset or mad they simply show these emotions
through their behaviour. A good example of this might be the little boy in the
supermarket who throws a tantrum because he’s upset. Many parents
have had to deal with similar situations. It is unfortunate that often times
these occurrences are overlooked or dismissed because they are
“just children”. Anger management in children is as important, or perhaps
even more important than anger management in adults.
Guidance In Anger Management
A child requires instruction and guidance from their coming into the world
to their entry into adulthood. The things they learn throughout their
young lives are likely to form the person they become as an adult.
For this reason, anger management in children with difficulties
controlling their temper is extremely important. Finding ways to teach
anger management in children might present challenges.
There are programs designed specifically for children with anger
management issues. Finding one that works for a particular child
might require testing many methods. Not all children will respond
to the same treatments for anger management in children.
Because a child cannot always relate their feelings surrounding
an angry outburst, finding the right approach may take some time.
Until the issue is resolved or at least controlled, it is imperative to
continue the search.
Worksheet And Fun Activities
Young children may respond well to worksheets, games and fun activities.
All of these can be used effectively to teach anger management in
children. Developing programs that incorporate each of these might
be the best route to take. A child completing a worksheet, colouring
sheet or participating in games and activities with underlying messages
regarding anger management, may not even realize they are working on
their problem. Making the activity fun doesn’t mean that the anger
issue has to be left out.
Critical Thinking For Fun
Choosing fun activities that teach healthy interaction
and decision making might be good for anger
management in children. Teaching them to
take turns and helping them to learn that they can’t always
be the best or the winner would definitely make a difference
when confrontational situations arise. Little activities which
instil values and positive thinking would be beneficial for
anger management in children.
If a child is old enough to talk about their anger problem,
encouraging them to share their feelings is important.
Suggesting they talk to someone who they feel comfortable
with and trust is a good idea regarding anger management
in children. Asking them to write or draw about their emotions
may be able to help disclose their underlying issues, whether
fear, hurt or sadness. Teaching them to ask for help when
they feel threatened or angry would certainly help the child
with a problem. The important detail to realize when considering
anger management in children are they are just “children”.
Their minds are not equipped to handle big people situations
and so they will require a more careful approach.
According to WHO statistics, one out of four people will be
effected with mental disorders.
Anger Management According To Quran
As humans, we go through many emotions that we feel unable to control.
Anger is one of them and the strongest one too.
Quranic Verses on Anger Management
“Those who spend (in Allah’s Cause) in prosperity and in
adversity, who repress anger, and who pardon men; verily,
Allah loves Al-Muhsinoon (the good-doers).”
[Quran: Surah Al-Imran, Ayah 133-134].
Allah Says in the same surah,
Who spend [in the cause of Allah ] during ease and hardship and
who restrain anger and who pardon the people –
and Allah loves the doers of good.
Allah says, “When they get angry, they forgive.
[Quran: Surah Al – Imran, Ayah 134].
Prophetic Sayings On Anger Managemet
The Prophet peace and blessing be upon him said;
Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings
be upon him, said, “The strong is not the best wrestlers.
Verily, the strong are only those who control themselves
when they are angry.”
Sahih Bukhari: 6114
Narrated By Abu Dharr: The Apostle of Allah (PBUH) said to us:
When one of you becomes angry while standing, he should
sit down. If the anger leaves him, well and good;
otherwise, he should lie down.
Sunan Abi Dawud 4782
According to Abu Hurairah (may Allah be please upon him)
narrated about how the prophet handles anger:
“A man said to Prophet Mohammed (PBUH), “Advise me”
He replied, “Do not become angry”.
The man repeated his request several times,
but the Prophet (PBUH) kept saying “Do not become angry”
Sahih al-Bukhari 6116.
Other than the Prophet’s quote about anger management as reported by
“Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him speak
goodness or be silent; and whoever believes in Allah and the
Last Day, let him honour his neighbour; and whoever believes in
Allah and the Last Day, let him honour his guest“
Sahih al- Bukhari 6136.
“Anger is from Shaitan, Shaitan is from fire, and Fire is turn
out by water. So then when one is angry, do ablution (wudu)“