All praise and thanks are due to Allah, the One, Who said in a clear and unambiguous verse of His Book ;
“and among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them and He has put between you affection (muwadda) and mercy (Rahma)”
Ar-Rum 30:21
May Allah send blessings and peace upon His prophet Muhammad, from whom it was reported in an authentic hadith that he (saw) said
“marry the loving (Al wudud) and the fertile woman (Al wulud) for I shall outnumber (the other Prophets) by you in the day of Resurrection”
Marriage under Islam is a matrimonial relation and an institution that legalizes the sexual activities between a male and female for the object of procreation of kids, promotion of love, mutual support, and creation of families which are considered an essential unit in a society.
Do Somalis have arranged marriages?
Traditionally, the family of the man arranges a marriage for their son. They will identify the best possible girl in the villages for their son. Then they propose to the family to ask their hand in marriage to their son.
The family of the girl can refuse or accept. According to the enmity between the families. If you might ask me, arranged marriages are far way better than this millennium ones. The divorce rate is quite high.
This comes when we neglect the traditions and behave and pretend to be urbanized. There is a popular Arabic proverb that is loosely translated as kulu shey yarjiu ila aslihi “ every being will return to their original state”
What happens at a Somali wedding
During a traditional Somali wedding ceremony the bride’s family, especially the father, gives verbal acceptance to the groom. through a sheik who takes permission from the father or the wali of the groom. Only then can nikkah take place. There are some standard dowries `“afar qaalmod” either a camel or a cow.
Due to urbanization, people have different dowry payment forms; paying in dollars, in Kenyan shilling. These days the first one is becoming more popular.
What do Somali brides wear?
Customary Somali dress for women includes a Guntiino, a garbasaar head covering, and a googaro worn under the dress. Makeup and gold jewelry may be worn, and traditionally hair and fingernails may be stained with henna.
The millennium they wore wedding dresses of assorted colors but preferably white. during the tadaba bax they wear hidiyaha Iyo daqanka clothes.
How do Somalis married?
In the Somali tradition, marriage is concluded through dialogue and consensus between the families, but also upon the initiative of the young persons themselves.
In that Somalis have or are trying to abandon the habit of arranged marriage. There is a Swahili proverb that says:
Mwacha mila ni mtumwa which translates to those who ingnore his traditional is a slave
Swahili Saying
The Obligation of having a wedding Banquet (walimah)
He must organize a banquet after the consumption of the marriage, in accordance with the words of the Prophet (saw)
A wedding,a bridegroom (arus) must have a feast (walimah)
Bureydah Ibn Al Hasib(RA)
The Sunnah Regarding the Wedding Banquet
- It should be held three days after the wedding night.
- He should invert righteous to his banquet whether they are rich or poor.
- If he has the ability he should provide one or more sheep for the banquet.
The Unlawfulness of inviting only the Rich to the Wedding feast
It is not permissible to select only the rich and as invitees and exclude the poor, based on the words of the prophet (saw)
The worst food is the food of the wedding feast to which the rich are invited and the poor are left out. If anyone rejects the invitation, he has disobeyed Allah and His Messenger
Prophet Muhammad
What the Husband should say when he consumate the marrige with her
When he is about to enter her, he should say
in the name of Allah, O Allah keep us away from Satan and keep Satan away from that which you bestowed on us (of offspring)
prophet Muhammad
The prophet (saw) said regarding this: Then if Allah ordained a child for them Satan will never harm him
How he should enter her
It is permissible for him to enter his wife in her birth canal from any direction he wishes – from behind or from front
You wives are tilte (harth) for you, so approach your tilte, when or how so go to your tilte
Al Baqarah: 223
The Prohibition of havin sexual intercourse with a mensturating woman
It is unlawful for him to have sexual intercourse with his wife while she is menstruating. This is based on Words of Allah, Most Blessed and Most High:
They ask you about menstrutation. Say that is hamfulthing[ for a husband to have sexual intercourse with his wife while menstrutating], therefore keep away from women during their menses. But when they have puriffied themselves, you may approch them in any manner, time or place ordained for you by Allah. For Allah loves those who keep themselves pure and clean
al Baqara 2:222
What is lawful for a man to do with a menstrutating woman
- Do eveything except sexual intrecouse
- The Messenger of Allah (saw) would tell one of us, if she was menstruating to tie her waistcloth tightly then he would fondle with us
- When the Prophet (saw) wanted to do something [ie kissing, embracing] with menstruating wife, he would put a garment on her private parts
Marriage in the Quran
Do not marry idolatresses unless they believe; a believing woman is better than an idolatress, even if you like her. Nor shall you give your daughters in marriage to idolatrous men, unless they believe. A believing man.is better than an idolater, even if you like him. These invite to Hell, while GOD invites to Paradise and forgiveness, as He wills. He clarifies His revelations for the people, that they may take heed.
Baqarah 2:221
Prohibited for you (in marriage) are your mothers, your daughters, your sisters, the sisters of your fathers, the sisters of your mothers, the daughters of your brother, the daughters of your sister, your nursing mothers, the girls who nursed from the same woman as you, the mothers of your wives, the daughters of your wives with whom you .have consummated the marriage – if the marriage has not .been consummated, you may marry the daughter. Also prohibited for you are the women who were married to your genetic sons. Also, you shall not be married to two sisters at the same time – but do not break up existing marriages. GOD is Forgiver, Most Merciful.
Nisa 4:23
Also prohibited are the women who are already married, unless they flee their disbelieving husbands who are at war with you.* These are GOD’s commandments to you. All other categories are permitted for you in marriage, so long as you pay them their due dowries. You shall maintain your morality, by not committing adultery. Thus, whoever you like among them, you shall pay them the dowry decreed for them. You commit no error by mutually agreeing to any adjustments to the dowry. GOD is Omniscient, Most Wise.
Nisa 4:24